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Secret Shame

Asheville post-punk/goth outfit Secret Shame, share powerful new single, "Hide".

Hide”, is the fiercely captivating first official single from Secret Shame’s new sophomore album, the band wanted to self-release the new single “Hide” on the eve of their return to Asheville’s brand-new/already-renowned recording studio Drop of Sun (Animal Collective, Indigo De Souza, Wednesday, MJ Lenderman), where they’ll spend the next few weeks tracking the rest of their highly-anticipated follow-up to their 2019 debut, Dark Synthetics.

"Hide” is actually the very first recording ever laid down at Drop of Sun, having been cut in June 2021.

The band’s fearless lead singer Lena Machina provided the following statement and words about the new track.:

During the pandemic, I have witnessed many people with mental illness spiral downwards. For some, back when many people were getting unemployment, it was a break from the constant bustle of life and an opportunity to catch up on old hobbies you’ve forgotten about, or spend time with family. For many others, it has been a nightmare of isolation.

Even people who don’t experience mental illness can be crushed by the weight of being alone with yourself.

I’ve seen people who have been sober for years get thrown back into drug addiction, and people consider

suicide as the only option.

While my partner and I were stuck in a series of small rooms throughout 2020, I was consumed with self-hatred unlike I have ever experienced. “Hide" is about the self hatred that I have continued to experience every day since, and more

specifically so, about the eating disorder I was diagnosed with in 2021.

I’ve gone back and forth about talking about my own mental illness so publicly, especially considering I do not fit the societal image of a person with anorexia. I didn’t want to open up the possibility for more judgment and scrutiny than I’ve already faced in my life. And I didn’t want to bring up something that could make people more depressed in a time where

many people are trying to find reasons to feel okay.

But if there’s any possibility that my being honest about the content of our music could help somebody who’s struggling, then the vulnerability and scrutiny is worth it.

If you or anyone you know is struggling with mental illness of any kind, know that your struggle is valid and you deserve to get help. You are sick enough and you are worthy enough of treatment. And you are loved. You are very loved.The abysmal valley you’ve been sleeping in for your entire life sparks into a fiery horizon without warning. You’re too caught off guard by this sudden change to notice that flames are growing. Rapidly, they eat up everything on the outside of your shell and pursue the light inside of you.

SAMHSA’s National Helpline 1-800-662-HELP (4357) is a 24-hour hotline for people experiencing mental crisis and substance abuse disorders. (800) 931-2237 is the hotline number for NEDA, the National Eating Disorders Association.

- Lena Machina, Secret Shame

They pull it from you and exfoliate you with sharp teeth and burdens. The flames leave no room for judgment or improvement; they only leave room for denial and the harsh stripping of what once made you who you are. You twist and burn. Slower this time and with even less thought given towards it, the heat grows cold and lonely. The cold towers over the flames and extinguishes them, ready to move on to better meals. It washes over the embers and creates a consistent ash, smoking on your rubble. Once the heat has subsided and all that’s left is isolating cold, the emptiness makes room for a blinding and spectacular light. Everything parts to reveal something clean and new. It’s a beautiful feeling, but still sharp. This new iridescent light has you realizing you don’t know who you are anymore. You’ve been scalded repeatedly and you can’t recognize yourself. You can’t sink into this. You don’t know how to handle the beauty. - Secret Shame, 2022.


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